Interviewing Andrew Baker (Age 8)

This is derivative as I’ve seen it done before, but I was curious to ask Andrew some questions and see what he’d say.  Here are the results with my comments in parentheses.

What is your earliest memory?

I do remember that when I was two years old I thought I saw a machine coming in my room.  So, I hid under my blanket.  And when I looked up, it was gone.

(Interestingly, I had a memory like that from a similar age except I thought there was a bull in my room with glowing red eyes and two Mexican guys narrating his mood.)

What is your favorite thing to eat?

Pizza!

Good, so you mean with green peppers and onions and black olives, right?

NO WAY!  (Vomiting sound)

What do you like best about each member of your family?

Dad plays video games with me.  My sister is very friendly.  Mom’s pretty smart.  My cat Felix is good for when it gets lonesome.

What is your opinion about school?

I probably think it’s a seven hour place for education.  Why does school have to be so different from my old school?

(Daddy’s heart breaking here wondering what he will say about what he misses or what was different.)

How was your old school different?

We didn’t wear uniforms!  You had to wear spirit shirts on Fridays.  And the mascot of the school was an alligator instead of a lion.

(Whew!)

What is your opinion about girls your age?

Interesting, a bit chatty, but I wouldn’t make girlfriends with one or I’d be laughed out of school.

What is the one thing that the president of the United States needs to do right away?

If someone said there should be a school outdoors, I think the president should sign a veto on it.  It might rain or you could get stung by bugs and there’s poison ivy out there.

(A reasonable attitude in favor of tradition.  As a conservative I’m proud.)

If you could wear any clothes you want, what would they be?

Shirts and pants with pictures of Pokemon on them.

What would be the perfect vacation?

A vacation to the place that has all the things you want.  Video games, Pokemon TV shows, 555 feet tall elevators, and lots of friendly people.

(This replaces his answer from last year which was “a place you can relax, you know, where they put pickles on your eyes.”)

What is the meaning of life?

Using it in the best way you can before it’s gone.  Like do whatever you feel like should be done.  There should be something done about pollution.  And someone should eventually make a Superhero Squad DS game.

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